Alas the Poops Kingdom has arrived!!

As some of you know I was waiting for this new cage for my bunny rabbit, Poops, and alas it has come. Braids and Jax You will be proud it's almost midnight and I have finished putting together, all by myself, the cage. Lets all hope Poops enjoys his new home and has more fun by himself all day while I'm at work :)

I met Tommy Lee's cousin!!!

So I was just merely browsing Craigslist a few weeks ago, had some emails go back and forth with a guy who had a bad ass my space page. He seemed very normal and nice and after emailing, we exchanged some texts, and yes even a few phone calls. I also met on Craigslist a hot stripper with a huge ass Cc%$# (I know this cause he sent me some naked pics of himself) and so we have also exchanged emails and texts and even phone calls. (Stripper's name is Apollo, not his real name of course). So Sunday I actually met My Space boy at a Hooters...no pun intended...and we had some beer and wings and well went back to his place for some desert...I mean we "checked in" TWICE and (yes we used Mr. Magnum) cause he was oh my god...for those of you who have seen the Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson video...he is just like that. And it was awesome!!! I left shortly thereafter, not much conversation, but his place was cool, clean and perfect for the evening I had anticipated. So I was going to go home and get ready for Apollo (I know I'm such a slut, 2 men in one day..Samantha would be jealous, Cheesh!!!) and he calls me and says " He would feel weird just coming over.....and then leaving right after, his mom has been sick so he has been feeling very emotional and he didn't want an evening with me to be just about sex!!! (Ha!! it gets better...) So he then says he wants to take me out to dinner, a real date, and that he has started to have some kind of feelings for me??? Ok, I have met him twice and yes we have talked on the phone a bunch, so I thought this was a little weird, but after he explained how he never has girls take him seriously and he has not had a girlfriend in a long time and he really misses having a girl to talk to and not just want to bang, it kind of made sense, I guess in his line of work it is harder than I thought to meet girls to "date". I guess his lifestyle makes it hard to meet someone, even harder than mine, and I thought I was lonely..... Wow, a stripper with morals and feelings...who knew!!!! So I said I would love to go out to dinner and we are supposed to go this week. I think the amount of dates and dinners have made up for my membership with Match thus far. Go match!!!

To back track a little, weird Billy (Goerge Foreman guy) never called again and I am going to use the grill tonight!!!! Thank you match for a George Foreman grill too!!!

Explaining PANCHITO

No I never understood why he said I blew him off. He gave me his number Sat, he said lets make plans for Sunday, I said ok, and I guess he expected me to call him at the crack of ass on Sunday to make plans. But since I was still sleeping, when he woke up to go to Church I guess, by 1030am he had written that funny bad ass email about Tinks and shit. So WHATEVER!! he can't expect that much from a playa like me ha ha !!! And I am certainly not waking up early on a God damn Sunday (sorry Mr. born again, I said God and damn in the same sentence, I always said I am going to hell) ....

Panchito !!!!

So one of the guys on match winked at me then emailed me. At first he looked hot, as above his screen name is Panchito, but I failed to read his profile closely and didn't realize he is a born again Christian and yes his last read book was the Bible!!! Not that that's a bad thing but since I am going to light up like a Christmas Tree the next time I step foot in church, maybe we aren't such a good match???? Anyone???? His emails were very complimentary and I figured what the hell a free dinner again. So I asked him if he wanted to meet up in person, he said how is Sunday, I said OK. So it's Sunday morning, 1030am to be exact and I just got this email from Panchito:

"I'm a little disapointed that you would stand me up, but not surprice. Kind of sad because I had a great impretion of you becouse of that e-mail about a month a go. But like I said, must girls on match love been on this site just for that trill of standing people up...Good Luck."

Wow did he finish grade school with this kind of grammar?? So what exactly is a TRILL of standing people up. I'm not a book nerd like Braids, or a wiz at writing like Jax, but you girls have definitely rubbed off on me... I can't go on a date with someone if they write this bad. I'm glad he thinks or should I say TINKS I stood him up??? With this kind of grade school grammar I'm happy I didn't have to endure another bad evening with Pancho...oh I'm sorry again Panchito!!!

I must add that the wedding was great and I had a blast, now Brent is on the shit list (which just makes me smile) and I will never have to see him ever. I'm glad I'm not on the shit list and I'm also glad I went solo and everyone still sees me as being happy. I also have to say that living on my own has really made me a stronger person and way more independent. Jax if you thought I was a good "bouncer back girl" well now I'm even more than that!!! HaHa!!

YEAH!!!!

Brent is not coming to the Wedding!!! He supposedly has his kid, but thats bullshit, he is in Buffalo with his mom and and stepfather, who is like a full time nanny and loves the kid more than life, he also told everyone he was still going to the wedding even when he knew he was getting transferred to Buffalo, so this is really cause of ME!!!! HE HE, I love that I still bother him, obviously more than he bothers me cause I'm still going and was always planning on going!!!!! I WIN!!!! I'm so excited but don't worry girls this does not mean I'll get too drunk and pass out!!! I swear!!

xoxo

He made me dinner, then got weird like all the rest !!

Ok, so I had a date last week with this guy named Billy, the one in my last post who was awesome in his profile and not so nice to look at in person, a little of a let down. So our second date was yesterday. He suggested coming over to make me dinner, yes I said it , make ME dinner, and when he came he also brought me flowers and a George Foreman grill, which he used for the asparagus. Dinner was awesome and we had a good night. Of course the whole time I thought to myself, "why couldn't he just be cute??" he is not really easy on the eyes, so to speak, and I kept thinking why are all the NICE guys ugly and the DOUCHES, cute. I hate dating!!! So he left late that night, no sex, just a bad kiss, which I had to help turn into an OK (better than bad) kiss goodnight. When he left I just felt horrible, cause thinking and discussing the next day I realized I am going to have to nip this one in the bud now before he starts to like me and I hurt his feelings, or this turns into another Brent relationship. That would be the feeling of a 'bad pressuring relationship' that comes to an end anyway. But tonight at 930pm, my phone rings and its him. He sounds very angry, like he had a really bad day or something like that, but when I asked him if he was ok, he just replied yeah work was just really long and hard today so I am going to bed, call me tomorrow or something. So I asked him again if everything was ok, I had told him I had dinner with a girlfriend for her birthday and was still at her house when I was having this conversation with him, and so back to the phone call. I asked a total of 3 times of he was ok, and the last time I got the very stern voice, rather mean actually, and he said " yes Dxx I am fine, I just had a long day at work, goodnight and I'll talk to you tomorrow" but this doesn't give it justice, he was down right mean. No questions asked he was pissed at something and I had no idea why it could have been me?? So, we hung up after his nasty response and I left my girlfriends house shortly thereafter. On my way home I texted him this:" Leaving to go home now, not sure if your angry at me or just angry. But ur job really takes a toll on you. Anyway sorry if your mad at me for something I did?" What happened after this........NOTHING. I got no response, no text, no smoke signal or carrier pigeon. WTF????? I thought maybe cause I didn't call him today after the dinner he cooked? Maybe I was supposed to do something or maybe I....Oh fuck I have no idea what I could have done to make him so pissed, and I have to say this is so NOT like him or his personality??? Weirdo!!!! So he just made it easy for me now, I don't plan on calling him ever again and if he calls me maybe I will tell him he is a weirdo or maybe I just won't answer and then I am sure he will get the picture!!! Men are weird, this guy who I thought was so nice and funny...well just turned out to be Greek or something. Well girls, another one bites the dust!!!!

Sum up of the last week

So I like Mr. Yankee and had a full weekend with him in Baltimore. (To back track a little, Yankee boy was a guy I met at the Yankee game while I was there with co workers, he met 2 of my girlfriends there who liked him and he was definitely cute, my first impression was: I like him, he is cute, but a little too much in touch with his feminine side, considering he was in Iraq for 4 years, yes he is an army dude, tattoos and all!!) Anyway, he paid for everything and he after the weekend he grew on me. I liked that he sang every word to every song on my ipod in the car ride to Maryland. He also has a nice body, dresses well, is very neat and clean (to match my OCD of neat and clean) and he also "checks in" very well. I used this term to explain to my girlfriends at work, when we were discussing the weekend details and playing Monday Morning Quarterback, that the sex was GOOD. I said we checked in to the hotel Friday night and "checked in" again before we left for dinner. All in all weekend was good, not sure if I get the impression he is looking for something serious or not. I do like him but we will just have to see what happens.

On another note, date with guy whose profile was very funny and sarcastic was a little of a let down in person. It was like we both hyped each other up to finally meet in person, and I was not doing back flips or anything. Still great date and awesome personality but not so nice on the eyes. I had a weird text from him over the weekend (while with Yankee boy) but we cleared that up over the phone tonight. What I thought was him being serious was him trying to be funny, but it came out all wrong in the text message. He apologized and said that he really wants to see me again. I guess I will, what the heck right?? I'm going to see him either Wednesday or over the weekend, and Yankee boy I'm seeing again tomorrow night. God I need a secretary for my daily events and activities. But leave the checking in part to me!!!

No need for words on this one

Mercy guy strikes again!!! This time it's funny and whats even weirder is I'm starting to like him, his creative imagination is growing on me. Also, he text me in Match that I'm more than HOT, I'm beautiful!!! The compliments (even though its from him) never get dull!!!

Holy Shit Batman...I have a stalker

OK....the stalker part..... While we were standing by my car and right before the kiss goodnight on date # 2 with match guy #6, Dee gets a text from ....... GEEK BOY!!!! Its not just a text its a fucking drawing!!!! (He actually drew cartoons as a side gig and was pretty good from what I remember...and pretty good as you can see above!!) Anyway, he even got my name on the bottom, and spelled it right too!!! But then he writes in the next text, which is the REAL STALKER PART: "This will come true in 5 more weeks!" Did I say Holy Shit Batman already!! He is counting down the weeks, Oh my God I'm so glad he doesn't know where I live for God's sake. This is very weird and eerie!!! I guess I do have to be a bitch!!! Jade you were right!!! I don't know I guess I will wait and see what happens and if I get another text next week!!!

TO BE CONTINUED.....

Match Date # 6

I had already went on match date # 6, twice. (Sorry peeps..too busy and lazy to write) and he is another just "OK"!! But I was convinced to go on a second date for "shits and giggles" and he was still just OK. He is average, skinny, little pop belly and a weird mouth..(For my work girls he is like an O'Malley just shorter and without the skeeviness) we kissed goodnight on the second date and it was just OK. He has a decent job, close with his mom and grandma, respectful and nice...All in all, I give him a 5 out of 10. Maybe 6, he is very laid back, easy going and did I say just OK. Well, he told me at dinner (date # 2) that he was going to bring me flowers but he didn't know where to put them or carry them. I have to say he reminds me of a more intelligent NOEL, (the really naive and sweet car wash guy), but this one knows what Silly and DISTURBING means. I have to find a way to get out of date # 3, since he already referred to where we would eat next time. UGGHHH, I need to be meaner and not care...Samantha where are you!!!!

Date's # 4 and 5

Date with Match guy #4 was well "OK". We met at a pool hall and had some drinks. He is an electrician and well he was better looking when he DIDN'T smile. Kind of weird huh?? I get a million compliments on my smile, even from this guy, and when he smiled it was sort of a cross between Jim Carey in the mask and a Jack'o'lantern. His teeth looked like a cut out pumpkin on Halloween and his smile was HUGE like the mask, so if he didn't smile it was ok. I had a good time, good conversation and he was in shape, a little on the thin side for me but at least he worked out. He told me he was really into Martial Arts..cool I guess, but I am looking for the whole package, not just 60%. He has the good job, body and seemingly good family values but I can't get passed the smile, Oh Lord!! So we ended with a kiss on the cheek and he said he would call me after the weekend cause he was going away for the 4th. We will see if date #2 happens with Match date # 4???

Date with Match guy # 5 was the biggest disappointment!!! He looked so cute in his pics, but in person, well, how should I say, when he was approaching me walking down the street (we met at the Nautical Mile again) I actually thought to myself, oh please let this NOT be him, please not this guy walking toward me, then the, HI Nice to meet you came!! (IT WAS HIM) His hair looked like half a head of lettuce!!! I swear if you were to cut a head of lettuce in half and spray paint it black, that was his hair do!! For God's Sakes he had more bangs than me!!! Was this Dee meets David Jones from the Monkeys!!! Ok so I had to end this one early. We had a few drinks and I told him I was going to meet a few friends in Rockville Center, so because he had to drive back to Babylon where he lived, he unfortunately followed me to Rockville Center, but then FORTUNATELY left after 10 minutes!!! I had a beer in that time and he didn't drink, so, he left!!! YEAH!! I was happy and proceeded to drink myself into a coma at the bar with my girlfriend!!! We all know when Dee drinks too much she passes out, but this time it was only for a few minutes and woke myself up with some cheese fries, got my second wind and was fine to drive home, but my friend drove my car instead just to be safe, I was fine!!! Went right to bed when I got home!!
Another bad date off Match!! This is becoming a problem and very disappointing!!! I was hoping for better with this Match thing but I have to keep trying!!! I have another date tomorrow (date #6) so... TO BE CONTINUED!!! (If this guy has a head of lettuce like guy # 5, I will cry!!!)

Update on "Beauty n the GEEK"

So I have been stalked by the guy who thought I was some super model and now he has been hounding me for another "date"!!!! So I told him that because of my job I wasn't able to have a serious committed relationship and he was kind of like "OH OK I'm confused with what happened and what your really saying to me..." I was like listen I have a crazy job, and even though I said on my profile that I was looking for something serious I am just not right now...plus I rambled into the fact that I just changed jobs at work and that I was going into a new group (which I am but it doesn't change my schedule) and that I was going to be expected to work alot of crazy hours. I kind of blamed this new group of mine to the fact that "I was just not that into him"!!
Anyway we hung up and I could tell he was very unpleased. I got another phone call July 4th and 5th and this is what happened. He called and then texted me that he wanted to know if I could do something on Sunday (tomorrow) and after a few phone calls his text basically said "I'm tired of calling you with no answer whats the deal with tomorrow?" A little pushy if you ask me. Well, as I am sitting here trying to type this blog of mine and of course answering emails from other match guys at the same time, I had to think of something...a good excuse to NEVER see this guy again. If I don't call you the day after a date thats to be understood that I don't want anything to do with you again, or the date was just that bad. I have learned alot living my life as a dude and realizing the mistakes of past relationships gone wrong, shit I have even learned alot through one night stands!! Anyway back to my excuse for geek boy! I texted him (note: never call, its a waste of my time and energy) and told him that my job has sent me to Georgia for training for 6 weeks (note: I pondered for a little on how much time I should say..3 months felt too long and a few weeks didn't sound realistic so I settled with 6 weeks!) And I said that I was sorry for not telling him sooner but I left on Thursday and was already in Georgia!!! (I felt a little bad but hey I thought it was the best escape plan from the Geek!!) I just love being able to come up with crazy shit and blame it on my job!!! Ok, so here is the bast part, he texts me back in 3 separate text messages 1st: OMG!! 2nd: I did get... 3rd: USED!!!! this guy has a real sense of humor, of course I wrote back that I thought he was crazy and that I didn't use him (YES I DID!!!! but not for myself, I was helping this guy out, shit he had to know that, ugly guys don't see the ugliness in themselves, and they say us girls are shallow, for God's sakes I saw stubble on his back ( YES I SAID STUBBLE< THE GUY WAXES HIS BACK..DEAR LORD!!!) Does he really think he would land a girl like me based on his looks???) So the next text said....(R u ready for this shit people): "you don't luv me..." How fucking funny!!! Um here is a fucking news flash, if I LOVED anything I would want it again..but I don't so...R U KIDDING ME!!! I just told you I was sent to another fucking state for work and for one you believe it and two you think I really enjoyed our date when I left after a few minutes and never called you again!!! WTF!!!! The last text was :" I adore you..I hope we can see each other when you get back" NOT!!! I really don't think I will ever let him know I got back from Georgia, so, as for Beauty meets the GEEK...."SAY LA VI" closing the door on Match guy # 3 (yes he was my 3rd date) !!!

Update on Cookie Monster guy!!!

So I get an email from the Dr. Evil, cookie monster impression guy and he said "so I guess there is no second date huh???" Now obviously if that were the case I would have called, this is now the guy making me have to be honest and say what he doesn't want me to say (stupid boys), so I write back sorry I no offense but I just didn't think we clicked, good luck!!, he has the nerve to write back "you didn't have to blow me off though", do guys really not get it?? Can they be as dumb as us girls sometimes, dude I am not into you or else I would have called 2 weeks ago, get the HINT!!! I actually wasn't planning on being as mean a I was but a guy friend of mine from work told me to stop being so nice. He actually was leaning over my shoulder and made me write what I said, I added the good luck part, and Dr. Evil was STILL mean about it!!! UGH!! Oh Well, I cant make every geek a "beauty and the geek moment" LOL!!!